Looking back on the previous research I have read, it is all too clear that men and women have fundamental differences in what they want in a marriage partner. Could this be a reason for the double standard of promiscuity? These basic differences, from an Evolutionary Psychologists perspective, could explain why today's society stresses this double standard about promiscuity.
Relating back to Schmitt's article from my previous blog post, he believes that the differences between what males want and females want are distinct. Research has shown that long term, men prefer youth and physical attractiveness while women prefer men who are older, intelligent, and ambitious.
Helen E. Fisher, PhD, (pictured above) is a professor of anthropology at Rutgers University who has written numerous books about the mating strategies and habits of men and women. She made a statement regarding the idea of youth and physical beauty that I found really interesting; she said, "Men and looking for youth and beauty, women know that. They do try to look young and pretty. It is remarkable how the makeup and clothing industry constantly plays on this. Makeup makes the face clearer, the eyes bigger, the lips more baby-like red, the hair the sweet light color of youth. Clothing, too: The belts and things that show off the waist-to-hip ratio, the tight blue jeans and shirts that mold the figure. Both sexes always know these things".
Could this idea of men always striving for the next young thing make it okay for men to be promiscuous in search of it? Could this idea of perfection lead women to be promiscuous in return for feeling wanted?
A theory has surfaced among the myths of sexuality concerning individuals sexual desires and gender. The idea that men and women's sexual desires are hardwired isn't new - contrary, this idea has been causing arguments and controversy for years. Now, according to evolutionary psychology, men and women have each evolved their own particular strategies for seeking sexual partners. However, I have a hard time believing this because if this theory were to be true, that would mean that men ALL OVER have the same sexual desires and the same goes for women.
Although I had to admit it, I did find evidence supporting this idea. Coming from the International Sexuality Description Project led by David P. Schmitt. He states, "both men and women show signs of being programmed to be monogamous in a certain way and promiscuous in a certain way. The main difference is in short-term mating strategies, or how men go about being promiscuous."
Schmitt believes that when talking about infidelity or promiscuity, men focus on large numbers while women focus on quality. At first I took this statement the wrong way, but with further reading, I was able to determine what his deeper meaning was. Schmitt isn't saying that women are designed to be faithful and men are designed to be promiscuous. Instead he is saying that both men and women are fully capable of being promiscuous and having one night stands as well as long lasting relationships.
Long story short, Schmitt and his colleagues asked men and women all over the world about what they wanted from long-term and short-term relationships. I thought that his findings were really interesting! He found that when men opt for short-term relationships they pursue more sexual partners than women. When women choose short-term relationships they don't go for large numbers but rather focus on physically attractive men who are high in social dominance. Another big difference was that men are quicker and more ready to say "yes!" to sex than women. Men believe that they only need to know an individual a relatively short time before they can have sex, while women want to know their partners significantly longer.
Schmitt determined that these differences hold true (across 6 continents!) regardless of whether women or men are married or single, and heterosexual or homosexual.
Overall, this journal article really got me thinking. (The article also happens to be quite long and I will continue to use it for further blog entries!) It is evident that when being promiscuous, men and women look for different characteristics in their partners, BUT men and women by nature can be as equally promiscuous. So, taking an evolutionary psychologists perspective, why is it acceptable for men to act on this biological programming but not women? IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE! Personally, I feel that our society, as well as the society of six other continents, is so misconstrued. Women can have casual sex too - get over it!
My pop culture example comes from the movie "Easy A", a modern day spin off of the book "The Scarlet Letter". The clip above shows Olive, the "promiscuous girl" performing a sexy music number. While the boys cheer, the girls look on in disgust. This shows societies feelings on promiscuous women - disgusted and something to gawk at. I feel that if it were the other way and a promiscuous man were performing, he would be looked at like a stud rather than a slut.
Schmitt, David P.Universal Sex Differences in the Desire for Sexual Variety: Tests From 52 Nations, 6 Continents, and 13 Islands.Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, Vol 85(1), Jul 2003, 85-104.
